About my regrets about not sampling the Big Red Pecker

Disclosure: I'm close to a wine illiterate. In the last two or three years I've taken little baby steps to learning to enjoy anything beyond grape juice. And I have to credit that interest to my dad, who discovered the booming northern Ohio regional wines (for medicinal purposes, he claims), and my boss, who really does know wine on a more international scale, thanks to a few years spent in Rome (also, he's from California).
Since I've spent too many years in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, you can see my problem.
Right now, above my head on the bookcase headboard, is the book Wine for Dummies. I've read some of it three times, but would probably retain more from this resource if it fell off the shaky stack and hit me in the noggin. I remember Deathly Hallows better than I remember what wine is made from what grape, and what region of France that grape is grown in. Not even mentioning the year.
Being a simple person, my palate is sadly unsophisticated. The more complicated the wine, the more I feel the need to just spit it out.
I was thinkin' about wine this morning because I went to the Toast of Ohio wine festival in Sandusky on Saturday, and a fine gathering it was. A circle of local eateries offering samples for a few tickets, so lunch was covered...and a big white tent full of local wineries, so all afternoon because happy hour. And all eight I sampled were great, and a few went right to the top of my head (my test of a good wine). The Red Kiss from Viking Vineyards, the chocolate wine--wow. What a perfect mix of flavors.
The most popular wine sampled, according to a Sunday story in the Sandusky Register, was a wine from Maize Valley Winery called Big Red Pecker. No way I was going to sample that, then be asked, what was your favorite?, and have to answer, oh, I liked that Big Red Pecker. But after thinkin' about it, I wish I had. Next year. (I tried the Red Neck Red instead.)
So anyway, what about you? What beverage were you thinkin' about this morning?