Wednesday, September 26, 2007

About goin' gray ... or NOT

Can a Gray-Haired Lady Find a Date? A Job? - Newsweek Society - MSNBC.com: "Can a woman let her hair go gray at 50 and still be considered attractive? The author of a new book on beauty and aging decided to find out."
Maybe you read this story online. I did.
And I looked at the pictures of that lady, at her with nice, dark brown hair, and then with half-brown and half-gray hair and then with all gray... and immediately went out and bought some hair dye.
Because, damn, she looks OLD in those "after" pictures. And I would think the answer to both those questions in the headline would be, "NO SHE WILL NOT!"
Neither I, or my family, nor the general public, have seen much of my real hair color in several years. I am owed a big "thanks!" for this attention to detail. Because I have seen my roots--even just three-quarters of an inch at a time--and believe me, they are butt-ugly.
How did my formerly dark-chestnut brown hair--not a color that made people gasp with surprise at its beauty, but perfectly adequate--descend into such uber-drabness? I mean, that stripe down my part looks like a possum has taken up residence on my head!
And this is the kind of reality I'm supposed to accept, and foist upon myself every time I look in the mirror, and on my loved ones every day, and the public at large? I think not.
Here's why: It's about something bigger--no, not about discrimination against older women. But rather, it's about believing in a good, benevolent God.
Here's why. For reasons known only to a masculine deity, he chooses to let our hair follicles loose their ability to produce color as we get older. So he's looking down on us and we're all lookin' like so many sinks of dirty dishwater.
And in his goodness, God thinks, what can I do to help these poor ladies overcome the little mistake I made with their hair follicles?
And in the 20th century, God recreated Miss Clairol. Thank you, God! Way to go, God!
How can we say no to the generosity of such a beauty-conscious Creator? I can't.
So that's why I ran out and bought that Garnier Nutrisse Light Golden Brown with the grape seed and avocado oils that's sittin' on my head this minute.
Gotta go. The thirty minutes are up.
Well, what about you? How's your head holdin' up?

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